NOT LONG NOW

The time is drawing near to our New Year, the time when our Ancestors are closest to us and the veil between the two worlds is at its thinnest. Traditionally called Samhein ( pronounced sow heim, or various other ways according to dialect), it has become commonly known as Halloween.

Wiccans/Witches/Pagans and many other similar faiths consider this a time to put on their ritual clothing, cook special meals, celebrate with friends and family and work rituals to contact and be at one with their Ancestors. Some even lay an extra place at their table for them to sit at out of respect. We decorate our homes in traditional fashion with seasonal fruits and vegetation, eat sweets and carve pumpkins to keep away the spirits that could harm us. Although each of our Sabbats are very important to us, Samheim is one of the few where we can walk among the people who are not of the Craft and not be unusual in any way. We can choose to deck our homes with the more accepted trappings of the "modern everyday interpretation" of Halloween and feel that we can share all our love and happiness with a community rather than those who are of the Craft without the fear of being looked upon as "weird" or feeling like we are restricted in anyway.

As the years have progressed celebrating this holiday has become more and more accepted and yet so many are ignorant of its origins and think it was a "thing invented by the Americans" lololol. As my dad says one of those faddy things that people will soon get bored of. Little did he realise that it was in existance way before its popularity and that it was a New Year rather than just an excuse to dress up and party. Now he does understand the difference and is very understanding of my beliefs. Not that he agrees with a lot of it but hey at least he doesnt disrespect my beliefs and ideaology.

Halloween is also only two days after my sons birthday so we have always had it to a degree as a Halloween theme when he was little. He loved dressing up as a zombie, a bat, a spider and most of all the devil (insisting he had to have 666 on his forehead....oh the lovely influence of the media!!). One year he had a complete Altar set up with pumpkins carved, large black candles, a giant plastic Goblet (with Ribenna in it), a cake in the shape of a Bat and all kinds of other bits and pieces. His cousin dressed as a witch but yet again she was a victim of the media and decided she wanted a wonky nose and a green face lololol.

Nowadays they are too old for such things as both are turning eighteen, their lives have taken a different direction, they know and understand what the celebration means to me and ask questions when they feel they need too. Neither of them have been bought up in any faith whatsoever and we have allowed them to make any choice they like with regards to it. I feel this is important and a choice that needs to be made with the right information and no outside influences. If they feel the need to explore any or many religions who are we to stop them? We will do what any decent parent would do and support them in their choices. I totally disagree with making a child attend services and extra classes in religion as some parents do with sunday school and sunday morning mass. They get great coverage on religious beliefs in their school education and are taken to various places and celebrate various holidays for various religions. To me that exploration is enough to start them on a path and was very annoyed when one mother refused to let her child go with her friends to the Harvest festival because she was a Pagan and didnt want her child going to a Church of England service. This poor child was left out then from every service that her friends went to and ended up being isolated from those activities. It is a shame to blinker your child in such a way, was this mother so insecure in her own beliefs that she was frightened her child would doubt them or was it a case as we sometimes find that mum was a complete "its my way or no way mum" with regards to religion and faith.

Touching on this subject I also have another friend who is confusing her poor boy totally. At eight years old he is allowed to have his head at shoulder length, to have vegetable dye put in his hair in different coloured streaks during term time, paint his finger nails different colours during term time, not allowed to defend himself when bullied, he has only started to eat meat in the last two years and is encouraged to basically run amok as she cant bear disciplining him.

Now ok mum is a wiccan, a holoistic therapist, volunteers for a local charity working with physically and mentally disabled kids, she is covering herself in tattoos and piercings to yell out im different and then dyes her hair blues pinks and greens all at the same time. She is so confused why she never finds a "nice decent bloke" when he has to meet an endless list of spiritual and physical "has to be's". This means she is forever bemoaning the male side of the race in front of her son who is getting more and more feminine by the year. Her attitude is she doesnt want to stiffle their creativity, their bond is close and she doesnt want it damaged and most of all she allows he too much influence in HER life decisions. He is eight years old, what does he know of life, relationships and all the adult things she expects him to understand without explanation???? It has unfortunately been bought to her attention by a rather indescreet and non too subtle person (whom she no longer has anything to do with of course), and was handled terribly. He basically told her that she is trying to make sure her son is gay by encouraging wayy too much feminine behaviour, he does not have contact with anyone but her friends children and doesnt mix with the 20 to 30 children that live in the same street and so he told her she was isolating him, he told her there was a fine line between creativity and exposing him to ridicule and bullying (which i agree is true). He told her that she needs to let him find himself yes, but if it needed to be done let him dye his hair in the school holidays rather than when he is at school, let him mix with other kids so he can find his place in life and learn to communicate socially. The list went on and on to be honest and it was all well meant just mishandled. Even now she still hasnt listened to people saying to her well ok he handled it wrong but hellooo you could try doing some of this stuff out with him before he goes to secondry school and has no idea of how to fit in the huge social community there rather than at a small primary school where he is at now. Oh well what else can I say, Im glad Im up here now as I cant deal with her bitching and lecturing anymore. To my dismay I feel I have overtaken her in so many ways and from being close to her and forgiving her flaws and loving her for her I have found out what a really selfish person she is on the inside and that all the wiccan and spiritual stuff she talks really is just that talk. She has created an image she wants to project to the world and to defy her family one which she can use as an excuse to say and do as she pleases. Its sad really she is a talented healer but what use is it when she cant heal herself xxxx