In an earlier bblogg I attempted to try adn explain BP but not sure I did it well enough, so here is a pic that I feel says it all really. It covers the confusion, the emotional distress and pain, the voices in your head and the feeling of being at least three different people. they all seem to run around in your head yealling their angst, each trying t be louder than the other til you just want to scream out "shut up" and in the end can give up fighting and take your life. Yes it is that serious, just because it cant be seen and heard doesnt mean that people who have BP are not ill...look at my pictures do I look ill...no????? Well I am, I suffer from the worse type of BP..rapid cycling. I would love to be either high or low or stable with regularity not zipping between the three and not knowing when it will change and to what. I fight it as all us suffers do and form friendships with other sufferers that are close and lasting as they are the ones who truely understand us. How can we tell our loved ones some of the thoughts we are having???? We can't, as much as we would love to, as they just couldnt comprehend or even begin to understand how we had reached our conclusions...they do not suffer from the twisted and distorted logic that a BP sufferer endures and battles with. For us to think about cutting off our faces, killing people and total violence is normal, its a sign of crisis that indicates you need to see the mental health team asap...but because you cant voice it to family they dont realise...in support groups online you get that support and are clearly told to get help and you listen because you know they are right. Thank you for reading and trying to understand
love and light
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